Marriage And Anniversary

Good morning people!

After a hearty breakfast and a mug of scalding hot coffee, I am all spruced up to face yet another day of my life.
My wedding anniversary is within this month. That anniversary will officially make me married to my man of 27 years. What do you think of that? Cool huh?

What was that?  How did I stay married for that long? I can hear that question playing inside your head about my marriage. You may become inquisitive and think to yourself, "Does she fight a lot? Does she get bored with that same person? How is her married life?"...etc..etc..

Actually come to think of it, I've known my husband for almost 32 years. We dated back in the early 80's for five years before we finally got married and settle down.

Do I get bored with my husband? Hard to believe, but no, I don't get bored with him. It might be because all our lives, we worked in the service industry (hotel line and later travel agency). We got to meet lots of people with diverse background. And everyday, we had to prepare itinerary for the next day for our guests/customers. We have many things to talk about beside our domestic lives.

I probably get annoyed with him at time because he is easily satisfied with how things are running at home. He used to be full of enthusiasm and bold.
But now, he's toned down and took a slower pace in everything he does. This saddened me and sometimes I find myself withdrawing away a little from him.
But worry not, we'll work out our differences eventually. That is what marriage is all about.

Early in our marriage, we used to fight  on frequent basis. He was young, I was young and we both worked hard to meet the increasing needs for our family. Like any other married couple, we faced many ups and downs and turbulences that strike us like a hurricane. There was one time that we thought of going into our own separate ways. But we fought back our differences and now as you can see, we are still together and strongly bonded.

To this day, the children have never seen us arguing over anything, well , maybe on one or two occasions, but that is all. In fact they don't even know if both me and my husband were not on talking term.
If I am not happy with him over anything, I keep my distance and speak to him only when necessary and he likewise. The best thing is, we both know what the other spouse is feeling. It's like twins. Only thing is, he would treat the problem like any other day. And me being me, would keep it inside my heart and let the feeling of discontent and dismay troubling my daily system.

What makes us compatible? I dare say because I am the one with lots of patience whereas he has  a temper that I hate. Normally when he lost his head over something, I would get out of his way and keep quiet.

To keep a marriage this long, we had to swallow some of the things that we dislike about our spouse. Believe me, there is no easy way to keep a good marriage this long. Both of us had to work hand in hand together even though it hurts our feelings..at time.

To young married couples out there, here are some tips on how to keep your marriage works:
1) Respect your husband even if his earning is lesser than what you're getting.
2) Respect him even though he may not be as smart as you are.
3) Man has ego, big ego. Try not to criticize or demean them especially in front of other people.
4) I truly believe a way to a man's heart is through is his stomach. Try to cook once in a while. They would adore you for that.
5) Men were born hunters. Don't make yourself too available. They'll get bored. They love their women to be a little independent, not submissive, who loved and cared for them yet not clingy. Believe me, men are actually boys trapped in an adult body.
6) Don't spoil them too much like paying bills, sending and fetching your children from school. Marriage involved 2 people. They had to do their share too. Once you start doing things for them, that's the day, you'll regret forever because men are notoriously known for their laziness. Teach them responsibility at the early age of your marriage.
7) Throughout the marriage, you'll notice many flaws and shortcomings from his part. Try to absorb it if you can. These petty little things could lead to a big fight if left unattended or if you are being too vocal about it. Take the safest measure, compromise. Also keep in mind, we may have our flaws too that he find it repulsive.

There, hope some of the tips is good enough to bind the love that each one of you have towards one another.
I know, there were times that we wish we could be alone and nothing to care about, but then again, who doesn't? Marriage is an institution that requires constant ploughing and watering to keep it green and healthy. Many would opt for the easy way out, that is separation or divorce. Yes, it worked for most people but we tend to hurt the heart of our loved ones, namely our children. They become the obvious victims when divorce occurred.

Whatever differences we may have, do the best we can to work things out amicably. Remember, we were once head over heels in love with each other, why can't we be nice for just a little longer for the sake of our children?

So people, have some mercy for your children before you make any decisions that you may regret later.
Have a pleasant evening everyone. Good nite!

Rose
7th.october ' 15